Who is this site for?

Becoming a parent can now be a deliberate decision with the assistance of medical and contraceptive technology. Of course it may not always be like this in reality, but theoretically parenthood can be actively pursued or avoided.

 

This is a relatively new situation and people are still adapting to it. Indeed, people may find the idea of choice around parenthood quite surprising as it is such a strong social concept; it is generally assumed that anyone who physically can have children, will go on to do so.

There are many different aspects to the parenthood decision that you may be unsure about:

  • Do I want to have children at all?

  • Should I have children?

  • When should I have children?

  • What circumstances do I want to have children in e.g. with or without a partner, the financial context and what kind of parent do I want to be?

  • How will having a child impact on my lifestyle, work ambitions, relationship, my physical and mental health?

  • How will not having children impact on my lifestyle and relationships?

  • How would having a child impact on any existing health condition I may have?

  • How does a particular health condition or medical treatment impact on my ability to have a child? 

  • What if I regret my decision to have, or not have, children?

  • How do I know what the right thing to do is?​

You are not the only one to have these thoughts and questions and it is possible to find answers.

It does take effort and time to work through and only you can know what the right decision is for you and your life.

However, I can definitely help you to work through the many factors and emotions involved to help find some clarity and certainty. Please contact me if this would be useful for you. 

 
Why is the Decision so Hard?

It can feel like everyone else knows what they want and we are the only ones who are struggling with this decision. However, this is a very important decision which will have lifelong consequences - surely we should give it some time and thought to make sure we make the right decision for us. We spend time thinking about many other decisions which are not as permanent as this one!

So what things influence our decision to become a parent or not? 

  • Health - physical and mental

  • Age

  • Finances

  • Relationship status

  • Family background

  • Work/career

  • Lifestyle

  • Maternal desire

And these are just a few factors which can be relevant. Each one will affect us in a slightly different way at different times in our lives. 

Some of these factors may be within our control to manage or change, while others are not, or at least not at the current time. This can add to the frustration. 

 

Social pressure can add another layer to the decision process. We might make a decision but then feel it is the 'wrong' one; that it doesn't fit in with society's, or our family/friend's, or indeed, our own opinion of what we 'should' be doing. 

So we can see that there are strong practical and emotional aspects to the parenthood decision. We need time, space and freedom to explore these topics and work through our own priorities and values.

 

I can support and guide you through this process. Please contact me if this would help you. 

 
How Can I Help?

I can help you in many ways - Choose the best option for you.

  • One to one sessions - in person or online            €60 per session​

  • Couple Sessions - in person or online                  €75 per session

 

  • In sessions, we will work on the issues most relevant to you at that time.

  • There are some useful self help books on the parenthood decision which include activities to work through. If you would like, we can use these as a guide in our sessions. I can discuss the most suitable resource for you and provide additional personal support and feedback.​

  • Online sessions are conducted using a service which is specifically designed for health professionals. It is HIPAA compliant so it is highly secure and your data and confidentiality are fully protected. You do not need to create an account or download anything. I simply send you a link and you go to the website. Payment is made through Paypal. Again you do not need to have an account, you can pay by debit card/credit card or Paypal if you do have an account.

087 9311574

Margaret O'Connor MIACP      ©2018 by Are Kids For Me. 

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